How Do I Tell My Partner I’ve Herpes

June 17, 2018

Whenever you have genital herpes, it can be very difficult to bring up your condition with a brand new romantic partner. Although herpes is merely a virus, it is extremely socially stigmatized, and many men and women are afraid they might be rejected due to their affliction. Even though it’s a fact that some folks will be not able to see beyond a genital herpes diagnosis, a lot of men and women that are living with herpes have found love.

You can too.

The most significant thing you can do if you’re fretting,”how do I tell my partner I have herpes?” Is educate yourself about genital herpes and its own transmission. This way you can answer some of your partner’s questions. You can also refer them to well-researched tools, such as these pages, to get responses , and you might even want printouts of useful pages such as the herpes review or the CDC Herpes Fact Sheet.

Below, I’ve written a script that will help you begin thinking about some of the issues involved with telling someone you have herpes. One thing to think about is that it’s better to disclose before you intend any sort of sexual intimacy, to give your partner time to digest the info. This way you can prevent either you doing anything you will regret in the warmth of the moment. When you have just begun dating, herpes may look like something that’s impossible, but it doesn’t need to be.

How Can I Tell My Partner I’ve Herpes?

I really like you, also I like the way this relationship is moving, but before we become intimate I want to inform you that __ years back I was diagnosed with genital herpes. I know that hearing the word herpes freaks a great deal of people out, but before you panic there are some things that I want to make sure you know about the disease. The first is that herpes is extremely common – the CDC estimates that nearly one in four girls and one in eight men have genital herpes, but very few of these really know they have it since many doctors do not screen for it routinely even when they are doing other STD tests. In many people herpes doesn’t cause any symptoms, which explains why it’s so common.

I really don’t know whether you’ve been tested for herpes, but being diagnosed exactly the way I was actually led me to think about the importance of getting tested myself, and asking my partners to be analyzed before we begin having sex so that we understand where we all stand. It can be frightening waiting to learn results, or coping with them, however I believe that it’s only fair to deal with the folks I care about how I’d wish to be treated, and that means being up front and honest about advice that I believe they’ve a right to understand. I’d love to be intimate with you in the future, so in the event that you haven’t been tested lately it’d be great if you’d consider doing this. I really like you, or I would not be needing this awkward conversation.

Ultimately, since I would like to have intercourse with you eventually, there’s one more thing that I wanted to bring up. Although there isn’t any guaranteed method to prevent herpes transmission between two people, daily suppressive therapy can help reduce transmission, and I am carrying (contemplating taking/not taking) it. Using barriers for all forms of sexual intercourse, including oral sex, may also help reduce transmission and I think we ought to plan on doing so. I will also let you know if I think I may be having an outbreak so that we can do anything else.

I truly hope I haven’t frightened you off. Please take some time to read about herpes someplace with dependable information and consider what I have told you. In the mean time… would you want to find dessert?